With All My Heart...

I am sitting here at the computer still in my pajamas, my face wet with tears, trying to figure out how to say what is bursting in my heart. I came home late last night to find your package on the table and was shouting, jumping around before I realized it was almost 10 and I had two phone calls to make (one to a Japanese girl who is deciding today whether or not to move in with a 40-year-old man). It's been a rough time lately - being sick, having some "problems" with the Walkers related to my job description, not doing anything I came here to do and not seeing even a tiny piece of fruit... This morning I got up after being on the phone half the night, tired, frustrated, knowing I can't quit but not really wanting to be here, either... I was in my room praying, weeping, hen I remembered that I hadn't gotten to check out the video letter when I got in last night in all the turmoil (I'll probably hear back from my Japanese friend tonight or tomorrow).

So I came out and popped it in... And you will never, EVER, EVER, EVER know how much it meant to me! Just to see your faces and hear your prayers!! I'm crying again just thinking about it. The verses you used - oh, how could you have known that they were exactly what I needed to hear at this exact moment! You didn't - but God did! I don't think I've ever been in such a spiritual desert - and yet at noon today, a Sunday, God used you to send His manna.

I miss your faces so much, your words, your life, the unity we have together as God's children, the things we shared (and still share) together because God allowed our paths to cross...

There wasn't a minute during that video that my eyes were dry. I miss you all sooooo much! So much! I wish you knew. All I can say is how incredibly precious you all are, how much you've changed my life and guided me closer to the Father...

Oh, the treasures in heaven you have even if I can't give you much back here on earth!

I love you so much and am more moved by this than anything I can think of during my entire six months in Japan.

I wish all missionaries were as blessed as I am to have people like you in my life.

Thank you - along with all the things I can't find words to say!

jenny